Wednesday, October 25, 2023

Flames

 Going down like a ball of flames,

Everyday is harder and has more pain. 

Feeling unlovable, and disconnected,

Please rescue me from my own head.

 Emotionally unstable and feeling lonely, 

When will this end, I’m going crazy! 


Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Tired


Tired of feeling the torture of my internal pain...
Tired of  being nauseated from worryingI'm going insane!
Tired of feeling everything, so very damn deeply....
Tired of absorbing the negativity from everyone , 'cause its killing me!
Tired of loving and caring about people,  way more they will ever care about me....
Tired of feeling like everyone is gonna flipping leave !
And Im Tired  of feeling like I just don't  matter..
I'm just tiredand I want to be happier.

Friday, May 20, 2016

The point?

The point?

I dont understand the world..!!   You are born to what?  To make money, and to love, to have a family and make friends,  and then,  of course, to get attached to these people.. So that in time, after you are good and attached,  you end up losing one, some, or even all.

We are taught, that to be someone and to have nice things,  you need to make money.  But menial amount of people are happy to go to their repetitive jobs,  and really nobody has a choice but to eventually fall in love and then ultimately die.

To me I just see hard, continuous labor,  and essential heart ache..... Getting old and suffering till your demise;   so that now others are suffering from your loss..   What exactly is the point?  The pain can be unbearable, and the heartache almost intolerable.  The small amounts of pure happiness and fun that you  do have,  are becoming slimmer by the day. Its becoming more and more difficult to enjoy even the small things  when the "real world" is so very stressful. But Mostly you are sad,  and can only hope and dream of something more than this routine you call life.
  People say you should keep a happy,  and positive outlook on life..   But what is so postitive about it really?  Im Positive its confusing, unfair,  tiring,  and just utterly painful.